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Part 1: The Sanctity of Motherhood and the Path to a Sustainable Family Dīpa Nārāyaṇa Bhagavān Kī Jai, Deva Puruṣa Mahādeva Kī Jai, Dharma Samrācakatā Guru Svāmī Madhavānandajī Bhagavān Kī Jai, Sanātana Dharma Kī Jai. Welcome, everybody. Good morning. I think the translators should sit here, up front, so that people can see you — or perhaps this side, else they do not see you, no? Sometimes they understand through mouth movement. Yes, very good, thank you. So today, again, a beautiful day. You all know this is a period of the Divine Mother. But the question could be: who is not a Divine Mother? Is there any mother who is not divine? So all mothers are divine. And why not the father? The father is also a holy father. If the mother is divine, then the father is holy. Perfect. And when father and mother are holy and divine, and if the children are the supreme, then the children are indeed the supreme — His supreme creation. By birth, all children — whether animals or humans — belong to this circle. We are talking about mother, father, and the quality of the generations. I was just speaking with our Hungarian doctor. What is your name? Sorry. Yes, she is also Sītā, like Rāma and Sītā. She has beautiful research work, attends many conferences, and her presentation is about how much happiness or joy is born with the birth of a child — how love is born. Recently she was at a conference, and again she is going to the next one. She will speak about this before I continue my talk. So if she can come here, welcome. Will you speak Hungarian or English? Okay, so she will translate. Please take a seat. She has long years of yoga practice in her life — a long-time sister, I would not say old. You can come a little forward, hang your legs down, so you can sit comfortably, as if sitting on a chair. Yes, good? Very good. Thank you so much, Swamiji, that I can talk about this. It is a surprise to me. I always hold Swamiji’s teaching in my heart and mind whenever I do research. When I research, Swamiji is always in my mind and heart. I asked the medical faculty at a university in Budapest sixty-four questions about how they look after their newborn babies and how love was born for them. One of the main questions was: what do they think about when love for their newborn babies is born? About twenty-seven percent answered that before they got pregnant — since puberty — they had a dream that they would like to have a baby, and they would love their baby. For several of them, the love was born during pregnancy. So, altogether, before pregnancy and during pregnancy, eighty-seven percent of the mothers developed love for their baby. Only less than one percent developed love after the birth of the children, or were even uncertain about it. I also asked whether the love for the newborn baby was similar or different during pregnancy and after delivery. A significant number answered that, basically, the love was very similar; the difference lay in the feeling that they could touch or see their baby — so not the love itself. I asked whether the love for their children was different compared to anyone else in their family or around them, or whether it was the same as for their husband, their friend, or their parents. The answer was significant: for children, love never stops; they will forgive everything, and it is basically limitless. At the same time, it was interesting that they shared many sentences about love for other people — family, parents — and they answered that love can stop. So, in general, their approach to love was that it can stop. A significant number said yes, they can love but then stop for other people. When I asked when they can stop and for what reason, they answered, “If they cheat me, if they lie to me, if they don’t behave properly.” I asked how they would behave if they loved them — do they talk about it, or what do they do? Unfortunately, a significant number showed a kind of passive behavior: “I leave it. I don’t communicate with them. I leave the situation.” Hardly one or two out of five hundred answered that they tried some kind of conflict resolution — to speak about it or do something to help solve the conflict. One more important question: was there any difference between how they felt about their own child during pregnancy and how they felt about other children? The answer was that there was a significant difference. For them, the self had immense importance. They clearly showed different traits, different emotional expressions, in how they feel about their own children. So the research demonstrated in a significant way that they feel completely different and react differently towards their own children. This mostly applied to her own family. Basically, they would like to share everything with their own family. I let them speak for themselves; I did not interrupt their answers. It was very obvious that they display certain symptoms of what we call our everyday life and everyday love — meaning their love can stop; they make distinctions about whether they love one child better than another. Even if they don’t do it, they worry whether they can love the second child in a similar way to the first. So it means we have a lot of work to do to show a good model for our children: how they love each other and how they show so-called love signals. We show our love through love signals — what we give to them and what we share with them. Many people need to confirm the love signal; they love through love signals. Because, basically, we do not have a special organ to perceive love. We have organs to see visual or acoustic signals, but we cannot name a specific organ to perceive love. So, I am going to conferences within a month to speak about this. Of course, it includes all of Swamiji’s teachings and all that I have learned from all of you, and all the love and teaching of the mothers with whom I worked over the years. And my own child is teaching. Thank you very much. Thank you, Sītā. Very interesting for all. You have again awoken love in the hearts of many young mothers here, and many are looking forward. I wish them all the best. But it would be interesting for the next interviews to explore the father. How does a father feel when he gets the news that he is going to be a father? How does he feel as he waits to hold his child in his hands? And how does his relationship with his wife change during and after the birth? This kind of research is very important now, in this modern world, to maintain family relations — and also our social life, our societies — to create harmony in civil societies. And it shows very clearly the relation of the mother towards her own parents. We say blood is thicker than water. It is very hard for women to balance between their own parents and their new parents — meaning the husband’s side parents. Yes, tradition is like this. When you are born as a girl, you enjoy your family house until a certain age. Then you have to renounce and go to the husband’s house. So you have two births — in one family and a second family. Children are always acknowledged by the dynasty in the name of the father’s side, which sometimes pains the woman’s heart, and her parents too. So this is a beautiful family research work, and it would be very good to work in this direction. You see, every mother and every father loves their children, except in certain cases. And problems also come between brothers and sisters, the children. Sometimes their parents also fall into the manipulation of a certain child against another child, which is not normal. Purījī Prakāś, Purījī Prakāś... So now, in this modern age, is there really a question mark whether happy families exist? You should marry, you should have children, but you must know that this marriage and these children are your final part of life. And this is missing a lot. Many marriages break after children, and people keep changing and remarrying. We have neglected our ancient system, the society and family system. I think I know, if I am not wrong, that in Christianity only one marriage is allowed, not a second. And now you see in the Christian world how many times they remarry. Definitely, I wouldn’t say the church, but the rules of this religion are very correct; they were thinking of the children very much, because children are the culture of tomorrow, children are the future of the nation, and children are the light of humankind in the future. And when children do not receive proper care and love from the parents, then later they cannot give. So think over this. If you are going to marry, then be sure that there is no more divorce. That’s final. Even if your wife stands in the kitchen with the chapati rolling pin, don’t say anything. You should have thought before. So, husband and wife are one part. Like Gaurī Śaṅkar, Śiva — half masculine and half feminine. It is within us. You are in the body of a male, but in your consciousness the dwelling is more female — except what we now call gay. So every man is dwelling in, and attracting towards, the female power, energy. And in the other direction also: every female has more of the male in consciousness, which you cannot hide, you cannot stop. Where a very beautiful, good, strong man comes, or a young boy of twenty or thirty years — you make a research, which I am doing every day — you will see that mostly all females’ eyes turn towards him, not with bad intention; it could be like a brother, a kind of friend, or a husband, but there is an automatic attraction. The flame goes in the direction the wind goes. And if a young lady comes, or a lady even eighty or ninety years old — and you, because when you are sitting in front — Mahāprabhudīp Karatā, Mahāprabhudīp Karatā He Kevalam, Mahāprabhudīp Karatā He Kevalam, Mahāprabhudīp Karatā He Kevalam... What the Siddha said: we need a signal. That signal is the word — not an organ, but an object. So we need some object to feel and create that love through vision, sound, smell, etc. Therefore, in ancient times — and in your countries also, I am sure it was the same — but in India, to protect society and maintain the family, there was a very interesting practice. Even now they are doing this, but whether they follow it or not is a different matter, because the modern world has everything. Such hurricanes have come, scattering seeds from one field to another, to other countries, and so on. And the question is, why not? So you cannot give any commentary. It’s okay, good. We are now global. But what they always say in conferences is: think globally and act locally. So any elderly lady comes — who could be about twenty or fifteen years older than you, it doesn’t matter, man or woman — they will address her as “Māṭājī,” Mother. Even if you see her for the first time, when you say “mother,” then it’s clear. You have love for her as a mother, and she will have love for you as her child. And if some lady is about your age, a few years above or below — Mahāprabhujī Karatā, Mahāprabhujī Karatā He Kevalam, Mahāprabhujī Karatā He Kevalam, Mahāprabhujī Karatā He Kevalam... So, this culture unites the society; it doesn’t divide the society. And when once you say “sister,” or “daughter,” or “mother,” then you should maintain it lifelong. You will have no problem maintaining it. It is very, very easy, and it becomes like one family. That woman whom you addressed as “mother” will never think of you as a boyfriend or a husband. And in this way, when you marry, you will have a lifelong happy life. So there are certain ways to protect families according to our ancestors’ instructions. There is the man-made world and the God-made world. The God-made world is perfect, and the man-made world is imperfect. There are so many conferences going on around the world: food problems, water problems, environmental problems, searching for sustainability — wasting billions of dollars, and the result is zero. And why did we come to this point, to achieve sustainability? The Creator created this world. He thought a lot, and He made all the systems which are sustainable. But we unbalanced it, we destroyed it, and now we think to join it back together. Yet no one takes one step towards getting a better world by limiting our needs, limiting our greed. All these conferences are going on for commercial things — for the companies, the money, now the money. Mahāprabhujīp Karatā He Kevalam, Mahāprabhujīp Karatā He Kevalam... The Indian said, “The last tree will be chopped off, and the last fish will die.” Oh man, then you will realize that you cannot eat your dollars. So this term “green economy” is wrong. It should be brought in a different way. So, my dear, we began by saying that every mother is a holy mother. But through some circumstances or certain illnesses, that mother may do something wrong which children do not like. And because of her illness, or her behaviors, or manipulation, or because she remarries and they do not like you — because when you remarry, then be sure your child will suffer. The child is then divided among many families — the family of the father, the child, and the other man with whom you go. Now it is shared in many pieces. Then, the fourth one who can calm down this child is the babysitter. So, what do we expect for our future? Our youth are not guilty; guilty are we, the parents. The most beautiful and best education we get is in our parents’ lap. The lap of the parents should be available for a whole life. And when the mother or father dies, how much pain we feel — we have lost that lap of love, that cradle of love, that cradle of security. But the mother’s and father’s lap is lost before. Now they have a laptop. They place it on their lap; they replace the lap with the laptop. So what we think about our future — that is darkness. As much as we go towards economy, no matter through which way, we are damaging ourselves. Mother Nature has enough for our needs, but not for our greed. So let us come back to the same point I talk about today. Part 2: Inner Karmic Purification and the Battlefield of Dharma And our dear sister Sītā shared some observations. Now she has good points to research further what your master said. You can quote that there is inner karmic purification. Now, you know, many of us are blessed ones, for we fully enjoyed the love of our parents. That means our parents were together, they never quarreled, they did a great deal for us, and they gave us everything. We are blessed ones. But many who did not have these experiences come to me—young kids, maybe twenty or thirty, even elderly—and they cry. “What is my destiny? Why do I have this situation?” Yes, the little child, five or four years old: three days the father can have him, take him from the kindergarten, and on the other days the mother has him, and the mother gives him to some babysitter and goes off with her new husband or a friend somewhere. So the child becomes a ping-pong ball. That is truly not good. So what karma, what destiny is at work there? Often, many of us sit with the girls or the boys or an elderly person, and we see a happy family: happy parents, the child holding the fingers of father and mother, a little child walking with them. How happy they are! And so many other things. But someone says, “I didn’t have the finger of my father. I didn’t have a father when I walked with my parents—someone who would take me in his hands, put me on his shoulder, or carry me.” Amitābha Amitābha… And you know, Hungarians—your government is happy when you have good children, happy children. Hungary is a prosperous land, with a good climate, good soil, everything. And other countries too. But decide, be sure: this is now lifelong, fixed to this one path to follow. And that is why you cannot have a second marriage in the church. If the priest performs it, he goes against the principle of Christianity or the Bible. So these are very clear instructions. One marries and takes care of both sides, and no one dies young. And if one partner dies, then you live with your children and raise them. You have to give the love of both parents to the child. Otherwise, we marry out of selfish feelings. There are so many boys and girls sitting, and I see them every month with some other boy. Every year, another one, and she says, “Please bless me.” So, how many boys have I blessed? And how many girls have I blessed? Either my blessing doesn’t function. So I live with that ancient traditional culture, because I read, I see, I feel how happy humans once were. At that time we didn’t have enough comforts, yet we were happier than now. We had no cars, no electricity, no telephones, no heating in the rooms, no hot water, and toilets were outside in the garden. Still, many Hungarians—forty percent of Hungarians—have toilets in the garden, except in big cities. Even in the middle of Budapest, there are many old houses with people living in them, and they have this in the garden. They are not dying from this illness. The point is this: it is much better than the other one that goes into the Danube. Because all the time they had a system. Many other creatures developed there, and they neutralize everything, so this is not a problem. We didn’t have all these things. Now we have everything. Even at that time, kings did not have the comfort that you have here today. But we are not happy. We are struggling, talking about what to do, while at that time it was all comfortable and happy. A person who wanted to travel from Budapest to Vienna—it was a two-, three-, or five-day journey by horse, ox cart, or walking. That was some kind of journey, like a pilgrimage to the Himalayas. So going from Budapest to Vienna, three hundred kilometers, how many days do you need? You could walk a maximum of forty kilometers at that time, easily. And what about us? After a five-kilometer walk, we say it was a wonderful walk. So people were healthy, they had strength. Their immunity was the best; they were not so easily attacked by any flus. And there was very little of the disease we now call cancer and all that. Because we lived in a natural way. Now, the question again arises: karmic cleansing. So a young man or woman sits on the bank of the Danube, looking towards Budapest and thinking, “God, what destiny I have. I lost my parents. I know where my mother is and where my father is. I can say, ‘Hello, Mother,’ and that’s all.” Purījī, Purījī… That means I have no decisions left. I have no right. You see the Mahābhārata—when you read the Mahābhārata, the dynasty of the Kauravas and Pāṇḍavas. And on that Kaurava side, there was a figure called Bhīṣma. Bhīṣma should have become the king, but this story is a long one. Bhīṣma’s father fell in love with some other woman. She was not married, of course. And she was from the boatman, who ferried people from one bank to the other. The king saw her and fell in love. So that was the signal, what he called the object. Without an object, there is no subject. When the subject appears, then you have to work towards the object, if there will be some objection to your subjection. So the girl’s father gave a condition to the king: you can marry my daughter only if her child becomes the king. And you already have one child, the eldest. So he will be the king. In that case, I’m sorry, I cannot give my daughter to you. So the king became depressed. Many doctors, Āyurveda, came, and many saw him, but he was growing paler and paler every day, like an ammonia disease. I have explained sometimes the different kinds of fire: Vairāgni, Jāṭāgni, Havānāgni, Krodhāgni, and Kāmāgni—the fires within a person. So he was suffering. He neglected the affairs of his kingdom, and all the people were sad. What had happened to the king? And that is like one of those, what do you call them, a kind of place where you go for some treatment—rehabilitation, or some kind of course, you know, to lose kilos. A spa, it makes spas. So some people fast, taking only milk and bread, or only juice, and they lose the kilos. And when they come back from that rehabilitation center, on the way they go shopping. Two or three bags full in the car boot, and they fill the fridge. A two-month course is lost in five days. In five days, again, you are like a bean you put in water: in the evening a dry, small bean, by morning it’s popped up. So again you come home. Such a kind of course or retreat is not healthy. So many times the boys and girls lose so many kilos because of jāṭāgni. They go to the doctor: “I feel pain, pressure between the ribs.” ECG, this, that—they do so many things, but they don’t find any physical problem. Then some wise doctor, like all of you, asks, “Do you have some problem?” “No, I have no problem.” “But are you having some emotional issue?” “Yes.” So the doctor said, “Yes, I know now.” That king became paler and paler. His son came to know: “My father is suffering because of that woman whom he would like to marry.” And Bhīṣma was the son of the Gaṅgā. So the holy Gaṅgā had come only for a certain time and then disappeared. And Bhīṣma was also some kind of divine incarnation. A child of miracles will also disappear. So when the Gaṅgā went away—when she married that king—she told him, “I want one promise: whatever I do, don’t ask me why. Don’t say no to me, and don’t tell me not to do it. If I am to be with you for this lifetime, then the moment you ask me why, or say no, that will be the last day or last minutes of our being together.” And she would go again to the Gaṅgā. So Gaṅgā Putra Bhīṣma, also known as the son of the Gaṅgā. Then Bhīṣma came to know of the situation, so he went to the father of that girl and asked, “What is the difficulty? Any objection? Why not?” He said, “Very simple: my daughter’s child should be the king, that’s all. But the problem is this: you are the eldest one.” So Bhīṣma said, “I promise I will quit being a king, and her child will be the king.” The father—the girl’s father—said, “Okay, you can quit your rights. But you have no right to quit the rights of your children. One might come first, before you have a child, and that child has the right.” So Bhīṣma said, “I promise that I will never marry.” And then the father agreed, and the story goes on for a long time. One of the greatest and biggest epics is the Mahābhārata. Ever has it been written, how many thousands of mantras? Many, many, many. It is great. Now, when you read this Mahābhārata—or there is a beautiful video, Mahābhārata, very interesting—but don’t watch it as if it were somewhere else. That will recall your qualities, and so whichever side you are on, you will choose it, you will find it. Sometimes the Kaurava side, sometimes the Pāṇḍava side, and you will know which of your qualities is playing that role. Yes, sometimes Draupadī, sometimes Gāndhārī, Arjuna’s mother Kuntī, or the Pāṇḍavas, or the Kauravas, Bhīṣma… Mahāprabhudīp Karatā Mahāprabhudīp Karatā He Kevalam Mahāprabhudīp Karatā He Kevalam Mahāprabhudīp Karatā He Kevalam… This chapter begins: “dharm kṣetre kuru kṣetre.” “Dharma kṣetra” means the land of dharma. “Dharm kṣetre kuru kṣetre” refers to Kurukṣetra, that was the kingdom of the Kauravas. There was this battlefield. So this body, our human body, is the dharma kṣetra. We are born in the land of dharma, human dharma. But in this body, two forces are fighting. Kaurava wants to possess this, and Pāṇḍava wants to possess this. It belongs to the Pāṇḍavas. And Kaurava and Pāṇḍava, both are brothers, real brothers, from the same mother. It is complicated, very difficult. But if you look peacefully, it may be just one episode. And don’t think, “Aha, it was like that, it was”—no. Automatically, we will reflect and think. Now, where are you on this plane? And you will see how the enemies are working against you. They prepare years and years of war against you, and when they see you, they say, “Oh, so kind, yes, your highness, yes, king, yes.” But inside, they are mixing poison. They are grinding the poison, mixing the poison. So it is said, “Mukhme Rām, Bagalme Surī.” On the mouth you have the name of God. Sūrya, Sūrya… That will make clear your path, but see that film; we can organize it in our āśramas during satsaṅg, so one or two episodes, watch every day, it’s great. So, Dharmakṣetre—the human body is that field of dharma, Kurukṣetre. And in this Kṣetra, how many Āsurī Śaktis and Daivī Śaktis? When Kṛṣṇa comes, he tells Arjuna, “Arjuna, I am not supporting you because you are the son of my aunt. I am on your side because you are my son, Kuntī, but I am on your side, on the Dharma side, so support the Dharma, not Adharma, because Adharma destroys the Dharma, confuses all, meaning it pulls them towards the Āsurī Śaktis, the negative Śaktis.” Therefore Kṛṣṇa said, “I am on the side of the Dharma, not on Arjuna’s side because you are my bhakta, or because you are the son of Kuntī, but I am on the side of Dharma.” So, Dharma Rakṣita Rakṣita—if you protect your Dharma, Dharma will protect you. Otherwise, yes, sometimes you can be happy. Duryodhana was very happy; he was fighting. He is a prince, and he will be the king, and he is very happy. And he tried to destroy the Pāṇḍavas, and Duryodhana said, “Though they are my cousin brothers, I don’t want to give them even a little piece of land, not even as much as the point of a needle placed on the ground. Even that much I don’t want to give. I will destroy them. I will root them out.” But he was rooted completely. Because ultimately, dharma—therefore Bhagavān Kṛṣṇa said in the Bhagavad Gītā, “Arjuna, time after time, in every yuga, I incarnate to save my bhaktas, protect the dharma, and destroy the adharma.” So the Mahābhārata is so beautiful; this is a story that should touch your heart. Sometimes it brings great happiness, and sometimes our heart weeps with blood. What can a human do because of one humiliation, or because of the greed to seize power? You know, Europe had, in every century, if not more than two wars. In the last centuries, how many wars have you had in Europe? But still, we have not learned enough. Because their blood is boiling in the fire of revenge. So a karmic purification will only take place through the Dharma. And though you are standing in the field of Dharma, you have to work against Adharma and protect all who are in this Dharma. So, Dharma Rakṣita Rakṣita Ha. When you protect Dharma, Dharma will protect you. You will see in the Mahābhārata so many times, in critical situations, when Kṛṣṇa came. He did not let you go down, and even Kṛṣṇa said, “I will not fight. Arjuna, I will take no weapon. I am only your charioteer. That is all. I will stop the chariot when you want; I will drive the chariot in the direction you want, but I am with you, that is all.” Yet it is said, when you are with me, then the whole universe is with me. So there is a beautiful bhajan, and this bhajan is very, very good. You have to understand this version: “Guru Dev Mere Pāś Kade Ho.” How is it? Guru Dev, what do you sing? Guru Dev Mere Pāś Kade So, Śrī Dīp Nārāyaṇa Bhagavān Kī So—the purification, inner karmic purification, my dear. In the Mahāśivapurāṇa, which is another beautiful, beautiful story, you know, the story of Satī. Satī went back to her parents because they did not invite Śiva, and when Satī came to her father’s house where the yajña was to be held, the father was speaking so badly. He said things about Śiva and Pārvatī. Then Śakti said, “Father, don’t pollute me through these words. You spoke so badly. I cannot return to Śiva so polluted. Don’t pollute me.” But he kept on talking and talking, and you know what happened to her father, Dakṣa. This is another beautiful video. So there are the Mahāśivapurāṇa, Mahābhārata, and Rāmāyaṇa. These three hold a great lesson. You don’t need to study any other scriptures. This is called Jñāna Sāgara, Athajñāna Sāgara—the ocean, the endless ocean of wisdom. But all you have in one place, ki? Guru Dev, merī jab pās khaṛe, maiṁ āś karo, kis kī, kis kī. So please, for the bhaktīs and others—hey boys, you who don’t sing, come this side; and whoever is not singing should not sit there. Come together, harmonium, and make a nice group. Harmonium, come this side. Dīp Nārāyaṇ Bhagavān Kī Jai. So you know the translation of the bhajan already. We will see you again this evening. And I wish you a very nice afternoon. You will have a little walk in the area, then enjoy a nice lunch. First, children; then, parents; and then those above fifty years. When they have finished, then all the others may go and cook in the kitchen. Okay, so thank you. Hari Om. Dīp Nand Bhagavān Kī Jai.