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You have everything, what are you searching for

A satsang commemorating fifty years of discipleship and reflecting on the guru-disciple relationship.

"I saw Gurujī for the first time in 1963... Today marks fifty years that I have tried to understand what yoga is."

"Gurujī was a master of a traditional kind, very strict, very disciplined... Whoever came into his radiance, into his circle, was pulled into that band, or into that air of spirituality."

Swami Avatarpuriji opens the session, marking the 50th anniversary of his journey with his guru, Holy Guruji. He invites Swami Premananjiji, who shares personal memories of serving the strict yet loving master, describing the transformative hardships and blessings of that closeness. Swami Avatarpuriji then speaks, weaving in teachings on the rarity of true disciples, the guru's equal love for all, and spiritual lessons from parables involving Guruji and Mahaprabhuji.

Filming location: Strilky, Czech Republic

Deep Nārāyaṇa Bhagavān, Devīśvara Mahādeva, Satguru Svāmī Madhvanājī Bhagavān, Satyasanātana Dharma, Kījā. Good morning, everybody. Today is, for me, a historical day. I used to do yoga practices and mantras, though not completely systematically, from time to time since the age of two or three years with my father. I saw Gurujī for the first time in 1963, the year my father passed away. Two or three months later, Holy Gurujī came to visit my village to give blessings to my mother. That was the first time I saw him. The rest I will tell some other time. Then, after two and a half years, Holy Gurujī sent an invitation to my mother for the opening of the Nīpāl Āśram in July 1965. So, I think it was one and a half years after that first meeting. Today marks fifty years that I have tried to understand what yoga is. At that time, Gurujī every day would spend ten minutes every early morning doing śīrṣāsana and many āsanas, utilizing a lot of Āyurvedic remedies for prevention—also netī, kundal, āsanas, and prāṇāyāmas. Holy Gurujī taught me something that came a few years later: Sanjīvanī Vidyā. You know the Sanjīvanī Vidyā, yes? Further today, I would like to give the floor to our dear Swāmī Premanānjī, who spent much more time with Gurujī than I did. So now, let's have this morning some glimpse of the Master and Disciple. Permanently, in preparation to our Guru Paramparā, Respected Viśwa Gurujī, Dayārāmjī Mahārāj, I had the great luck or blessing, the opportunity to stay with Gurujī for some time. It was in the late '80s, beginning of the '90s, that there was the possibility to serve him personally. It was somehow always a wish from when I first saw Holy Gurujī's picture, which was presented by Swāmījī at a Christmas celebration in the beginning of the '80s. At that time, I didn't know much about the guru or about the relationship. Somehow, I started to practice yoga and came in contact with Swāmījī. But when I saw a picture of Gurujī for the first time, it was a very impressive and moving event. There was a yogī in a yogic posture, and it was very, very shining and vivid. I had the wish to meet this yogī, and this wish was fulfilled shortly after when I first traveled with Swāmījī to India. Of course, as it very often is in life, pictures and reality are different. From the picture, you can't actually experience what it means to be in the presence of a living Master. Between the beginning of the '80s and the end of the '80s, I traveled with Viśvagurujī to India again, and in between, I had the possibility to be with Holy Gurujī. Every time I traveled from India back to Europe, I told myself, "Never again." But there is a difference between that home we say is in our life, our country, and that home which is within us. I guess the inner homesickness made me stick to it and keep on it and come back to where I felt really at home. That is the family where one feels, from soul to soul, the harmony and the reality. When I finished my studying in Europe, I went to India for at least half a year, and at that time I had the possibility to be with Holy Gurujī. I don't know how it was for Swāmījī when he went to Holy Gurujī in Nepal, but I guess it was not easy. Yet it must have been very beautiful. Gurujī was a master of a traditional kind, very strict, very disciplined. Not many jokes, but at the same time, a very joyful and encouraging personality. Whoever came into his radiance, into his circle, was pulled into that band, or into that air of spirituality. It happened automatically, without saying yes or no, and that was due to Gurujī's personality and his development. Gurujī was like the flower where the bees come to collect that honey, that amṛt. What he gave is splendid. I heard some stories about the time when Swāmījī was with Gurujī, and Holy Gurujī many times tested Swāmījī in different ways. But I guess there was something very, very strong and pulling in Swāmījī that made him go through all this hardship and tapasyā. Maybe the most important thing is that he very early understood and knew what was his way, or where he wanted to go. The achievement was there. I guess Gurujī many times pointed to that and told Swāmījī it's not an easy way; you have to be very strong, you have to be enduring, and have a very clear vision. As I told, I can only imagine to a certain percentage what difficulty it was, because remembering the time with Holy Gurujī, it was not easy. Gurujī was a person who, whenever you came into his contact, started to train people. He was very focused and dedicated to this training. In a certain way, we would say he was merciless. But one has to understand what it means to be merciless. To achieve something, to go through something, you have to be very, very clear. But behind this stood a love and a dedication and a knowledge that knows it is the only way, when you are very strict and clear, to achieve something in that way. There were many stories together with Gurujī when traveling around, being in his service. At certain times, I didn't know how to manage or how to go through all this. The one thing that helped me was that I just put all other things aside and said, "When I'm in service of Gurujī, it is the first thing; I am in service for him." It was a kind of 24-hour standby, and just forget everything else. It was a focusing from both sides, with the intention to peel some fruits out of it, that something can grow out of it, some purification. There were times when I thought I would never get enough sleep in my life again. There were times when I was driving Gurujī, and I didn't know if I was still sleeping or if I was awake. There were times when I didn't know where Gurujī was because he had already moved from that place, and I was still in some kind of coma. But all was just a blessing, a divine game. It was coming from Gurujī with such love and such affection that I sometimes felt very much ashamed about that. How is it possible that I am able to receive that possibility? What I mostly admired at that time about Gurujī was that he was somehow all the time the same. There was not something, what we say, mood or something. Sometimes it was good or not good, but his personality remained always the same. He was always ready to give, to give, to give. He had so much to give. His pot of mercy was so full, it was actually overflowing. But it always depends on how much one can take. I don't know exactly how it was when Swāmījī went to Nepal at that time, but when I came to Nepal, it was very, very simple. It was an expression of what we say: simple living, high thinking. That simplicity stayed for all the time when Gurujī was there. Only by the more or less force of Swāmījī were certain facilities provided there. Nepal remained more or less in that way as it was from the '60s to the middle of the '90s. In the last years, Swāmījī did a lot of construction work, and now Nīpāl Āśram became really a palace with a lot of facilities, a place to stay there, to do the sādhanā, and to get an impression of what an āśram life is. But what is most important is that the energy and the values of Holy Gurujī are still kept there. It was the ashram Holy Gurujī founded, and what is now preserved as a kind of token of his Gurudom. It is a sign or a picture from where Swāmījī also comes. From there, the roots are growing. I'm sure Swāmījī has a lot of interesting stories to tell about that time when he was with Holy Gurujī there. A lot of impressions and a lot of connections are there. There are many, many things to talk more about Holy Gurujī. Actually, it is an endless story because it is brought forward by Viśwa Gurujī, and it will continue in the future as Holy Gurujī is part of our cool paramparā. He is a vital tree in that forest of our own spiritual heritage. Although he is not physically with us anymore, he still gives us tree shadow protection and will remain as such. For the times to come, I am very thankful to Viśwa Gurujī that he gave me the possibility to be with Holy Gurujī, because it shaped my life, it changed my life, and it is filled with a lot of memories and good vibrations. I hope that many of you will also have the possibility to be long, long, long with our Viśvagurujī together in his service in different ways. Because once, maybe in the future, we will really realize what the value in it is. Many times in life it happens, when things are moving, when things are going on, we don't understand and we don't really value their preciousness. Only afterwards do we start to realize. So in that sense, 50 years ago when Swāmījī came to Holy Gurujī in Nepal, it was a very, very long time. And 50 years on a spiritual road, I have to say, where it started from, where it started, and where it is now, it's a miracle. This road maybe has been paved by Mahāprabhujī a long time ago, and we all don't know how far this road will still go. Because when I look at the horizon, I can't see an end. As you know, with modern techniques, the facilities change. So this small road, which started from Nīpāl as a mud road, a tak ta malá cesta, ktorá začala v Nípale je šesťprúdová dielnica, leading to somewhere, and it is our altogether common effort to keep that road clean, proper, and open for everybody. A je to šesťprúdová dielnica, ktorá niekam vedie, je našou spoločnou snahou, aby sme ju udržali čistú, správnu a otvorenú všetkým, pretože toto je skutočná cesta do neba. I wish you a good day, good celebration, and hopefully Swāmījī will put something out of his treasure box, some good stories. Nakoniec vám prajem krásny deň a verím, že Swāmījī vytiahne zo svojej vzácnej pokladnice nejaký príbeh. How are you? Ako sa máte? Nice. Good? Divine? So, thank you, Premanānjī, for your thoughts. Yes, sometimes we will write something, you know. Often, I wanted to describe or write, but people said, "No, this is not necessary." There are only some divine experiences, so we will see. There is one nice story in Līlā Amṛt, which you can read in Līlā Amṛt, written. One day, Gurujī and Mahāprabhujī were walking along the river. There was little water in the river, and there were very nice stones around. Holy Gurujī said to Mahāprabhujī, "How beautiful these stones are, these models." You can say model, we say door. But there is no expression in English about that. So Mahāprabhujī said, "Well, looks nice. But if you want to have exact measurement of kilograms, then, very rarely, from all these installs, there will be one accurate." Holy Gurujī says, "But it still looks nice." That is called the entoishunk, disappointment. So often you see, but it is, in the end, a disappointment. So again, Gurujī said, "What do you mean, Mahāprabhujī?" Mahāprabhujī said, "If still you don't understand, then you will not understand. There are so many stones, and very few will be accurate." It means you have so many disciples, so many people are sitting in the satsaṅg. Everyone has different ambitions, expectations, doubts, jealousy, greed, and laziness, just thinking inside, funny. Very rare are those bhaktas who really feel in the heart one hundred percent. Gurujī and Mahāprabhujī were walking on the banks of the river. When Mahāprabhujī said, "Gurujī, how beautiful the stones are, they are good, good." So Mahāprabhujī said, "They are like a stone, they are a stone, they are a stone." So, it is so many. Mahāprabhujī said, "I am doing like Rāmdevjī, you know, while talking." He is also doing like this. He is doing his kapālbhāti, but you know that he has an allergy. See, without saying "chhh," either you make like sneezing or clean it. Now, the words, the preachings of the saints, the Masters, are equal. So there is no measurement. There is no duality. But now, who will understand exactly? That will get it. Now you said, "Why did Gurujī give him, and why not this one?" Rain is raining in this yard equally. But there are some stones that don't suck the water. They are hard. And there is soil which is thirsty, and it sucks all the water and drinks. So, how is our heart? So, it is that one will get it when it's raining. Then that bird, which we have, wants to drink water only directly. And it's raining, and he's thirsty and opens his mouth, but no drop falls in. That's not a mistake of the rain. That's your karma. Maybe you didn't hold properly. So that will get to those who have inner space. Therefore, there is no duality. Sādhguru is samadṛṣṭi, equal vision, but some have doubts, and where there is doubt, it is out. And Mahāprabhujī writes a bhajan, a beautiful bhajan: Satguru kharahai so mīṭhā. You think Gurudev is bitter or salty. But the bhakta knows that He is very sweet. When you don't love someone, every word you turn to the other side, but if you love, every word you swallow like nectar, or like a kingfisher takes the fish, throws and swallows completely without biting. Doesn't think if it's dirty or not, hard or not. It goes directly. So when you listen to the wisdom of the Master, the teachings of the Master, don't try to model it. If you do, you don't understand, Master. I say, do it like this. And Gajanan said, no, it's not good. Oh, what a beautiful dialogue between Master and disciple. So it's not his mistake; the mistake is something inside, that's it. So you have to take it as a raw material. Everything there is one bhajan from some other master, a poem, but that I will not tell you. Because then Premanānjī will say, "Total merciless." So certain words and certain trainings can only do certain things. It is only the gold which can stand through that heat which the goldsmith heats the gold. Iron will, other metal will burn. So it is everywhere. Once, Jesus was sitting somewhere in the hills, mountains, and he was despairing, crying. At that time, a snake, a cobra, comes and stops in front of Jesus. And Jesus cries and says, "Father, I can't anymore. Please, leave me free. I can't." And a voice comes, "Know, my son, I have chosen you because you can. I trust in you. You don't suffer; I am suffering with you. Your suffering is my suffering. You are in the center of my heart. Therefore, don't think that you are doing. You are only a symbol. A shadow." And so it's not you are suffering, not I am suffering; our Master is suffering. It's not that children are suffering; the parents are suffering. They make the model, so to understand the Master is not easy. All these great masters, what we see in the books, beautiful, nice photos—bhaktas always put the nice pictures. Sometimes, some people who torture the people in the prison, and when they have to bring them somewhere in front of the media or something, then they clean them and make a little bit of makeup and like this. It doesn't see. The camera doesn't see. But the real wounds, the tortured ones, you can't see. But the pictures which you see on the altars and in many books are nicely our emotional feelings, but the real picture—how they were working, how hard they were practicing, how hard they had karma yoga duties—that you don't know. But if you want to go away, you can't go. Not that someone stops you, but your inner self pushes back. Premanānjī said, "The first time when he came to India, and then he came back to Europe, and while going, he said, 'I will never come to India anymore.'" But the last thing he didn't say was, as soon as he landed in Salzburg... and then, and then, and then. Yes, after one week, Mother India. That's it. So now he or me, we have two houses. We are in two countries at home. He is neither in Austria nor in India. But within, and with Swāmījī, you know what is the situation? Like wounded soldiers in the Second World War in Czechoslovakia, in the mountains. Completely wounded, can't walk. Winter, a lot of snow. Lying somewhere near the tree. His head is holding on to a tree, full of pain. But due to the cold, some legs became nearly painless. And Christmas Day, thinking about the families, and where he is alone now, wounded. So he is thinking, "Where is my home?" That's it. So we are all travelers in this world. We are born in one house, mother and father, but still we are searching. What are you searching? Still, you are searching for some house, some country, some business, some money. You have got everything. What are you searching? So our Jīvātmā is searching for that eternal joy and relation, oneness with that Supreme. For someone who is in childhood, it is awakened, but it's not clear. You are doing, but you don't know why you are doing. Yes? So, everyone has the opportunity, but your inner self is not ready. And you can't say that your inner self is not ready. All we are sitting here, that I will be the one who is self-realized. Everyone, we have a hope, expectation: We will be self-realized. We will come to Satyaloka, and we will come back as self-realized siddhas, Rishis, to turn Kali Yuga into Satya Yuga. You know, this was our saṅkalpa in the last Guru Pūrṇimā. And our saṅkalpa becomes true. Last June 21st, International Day of Yoga, I tell you this is a first, first milestone towards Satya Yoga, not because of any religion, not because of any culture, not any philosophy, not any science, but having some sense of reality that will create within us peace, harmony, love, and understanding. And so yoga is that which unites and will unite. Therefore, one should not understand yoga as if it is Indian and this and that. And if it's India, why not? But why not? Everyone goes to India. All religions go to India. All find a nest there. All companies go there. What have you against India? We have all, everything, including the malaria mosquitoes. What have you against? You don't have, but we have, and we borrow you these mosquitoes till here. So that is because you bring all this plastic and these chemicals. You introduced it, and since that time, the malaria mosquito began. Anyhow, don't worry. Either India or Europe is neither yours nor mine. It is God's. Next life, you will be born in China. And you will be proud of China. And Chinese, they don't like our economy and our politics, and they will be born here. So what is that? This Earth doesn't belong to us. We love China, we love Japan, we love India, we love Europe, we love America. Everything is our Earth, temporarily. The problem is the language. In every holy book, the same thing is written. Except for some different words, but because it is a language and you don't understand, inside awakening is rare. We are too much outside. We make differences. One has Tilak, one doesn't have Tilak. Why not? Why not? Now you know, everywhere they are making what they call Tato-Tato. Tattoos. Tattoo, I thought, "Tata machine." Tattoo. Tattoo. My God. So I was on the Adriatic coast two years ago, and you know there was Duga Uvala, and one day I went for a swim on the other side where there is a little beach. And there were elderly women, about 85, 90. Also, maybe her husband or the brother or someone. So they also have a little swimming dress, and I was surprised. They had down on their buttocks some tattoo. And that lady, she had around her neck like a snake, Kundalinī. So, I don't know where else they have tattoos everywhere. When you can digest so many tattoos, what allergy do you have to make a tilak here? So we used to say, "Who was burned with hot milk?" The tongue, you know, because he was drinking milk hot and too hot, and burned his tongue a little bit. Then someone brought yogurt, and he was also drinking yogurt. Burned with hot milk, drinking now yogurt also. Tried to cool it, so this is printed in your brain. Some experiences, or some cultural things, or something. And it's not easy to get rid of it, many things. Same thing, maybe I have, again, but I have something clear: the reason why tattoos should not be here, tattoos, is because there are spiritual symbols. The human body, the human body, should be untouched by certain artificial things; best would be without any wound. I would like to be like that, but unfortunately, I have. Not tattoo, but these, what they call, vaccinations on my, you know. So I was once chosen as an untouched, natural beauty body for the Svargaloka. Bring him up, and on the door they checked. Said, "No, no,... reject." So they took me nicely. And when they rejected him, they just threw him down. That's it. So we suck the lemon and then throw it. So, we do have a cultural conflict. Indians have conflict with other cultures. And others have conflict with other cultures. The Australians have a conflict toward the Indian Tilak. But they don't have a conflict when the Australian Aborigines come from here and from here, that's okay, or Americans, Africans, there is African culture. They have something hanging like this. What is that? What? No, no, a ring. Yeah. Why not? Beautiful. So, we have to understand when this kind of conflict will be cleared up; then will the humans come into peace. But we should not blame, torture, or punish someone because they are different. So is the same thing, spirituality. Only sitting and saying, "Rām, Rām,... Rām," that is not enough. Clean. That divine love. But imagination, we are not a Siddha. Siddhas have to be very hard-training. And thanks to Mahāprabhujī, He gave me a very quick, comfortable life. Spoiled. But still Mahāprabhujī was more merciful to me than Holy Gurujī. And Mahāprabhujī took me by the hand and sat beside me. This comes in my story. He came in my dreams, in my visions. So I can tell you that such a Gurudeva like Holy Gurujī I never saw and never will see again. That love, that attention, that care, and even the respect—I have to respect him, but it was immense love. At that time, there were no telephones. When I had to phone from Europe to India, I had to register the phone at the telephone exchange. They said, "After one hour, we will tell you. Call her to go to England, and from England to India, it was underground cables, and there it goes to the few centers in India. Then again, it goes with the cables to different districts, then, let's say..." To Jaipur. Then they called back. Tuesday afternoon, between four and five, we will try your call. After three days, and then I was waiting this time. And Gurujī got a message, and Gurujī was waiting there. Everything went perfectly. We had a telephone ringing, "Please remain on the line, we are trying your call." After one minute, they said, "Sorry, in India the landline is out of order." So we can't contact, like that. So when we write the letter, earliest one week, 15 days. But whenever the postman brought my letter to Gurujī, Gurujī took from his pocket one rupee or ten rupees and gave it to the postman. That time, one rupee was good. A whole family could eat. Vegetable, rice, milk, in one rupee. That time, in a restaurant in the Czech Republic, in Olomouc, one nice meal was one crown. And from Bratislava to Prague on the train, three crowns. And for foreigners, twenty crowns. Now, one crown, what is that? We have more money but less possibilities. So when I came to Jaipur, the postman said to me, "Please write a letter to Gurujī often." And when I left from there to here, Gurujī wrote me a letter the next day or afternoon. What he wrote was so beautiful. All the letters I have are in Vienna, so much. But he writes me, "When you left, I feel like someone has sucked all my blood out." He used to come to the airport daily and stand and look. At that time, you could see directly the airplane and people getting out, you know. Zvykol chodit na letisko v dýli a pozeral sa, vtedy ste mohli vidieť priamo lietadlo z okna. So, love what I get from my Holy Gurujī; till now, I didn't get from anyone. And you will not get. I got so much love, I am swimming in the ocean of love. But what Gurujī gave was different. Even till the last days of his life, he said, "In one hand I have a stick, and in one hand I have a laddū." What do you want? That's it. So that one makes you perfect, and it was for everyone. Not targeting one person, so Gurudev will be equally having love for all. But when the cup is full and you pour more tea inside, it all flows over. So life, this is a paramparā, is coming, such as all coming. Master and disciple, they are one, they are not two. But on the stage of this world, they both have played the theater. And in them, there are two players: the guru and the disciples. They are one. And they all come to play this one game, theater, to show the others, to inspire the others. And so we are one. And we came here to play, so now there is someone who is choosing who is the best player. So, Bhakta and Bhagavān are the same. Arjuna and Kṛṣṇa are the same. One came as Arjuna, and the other part came as Kṛṣṇa. But our ignorance divides; it's gone. Phool tujhe chadānā thā, to phool meṁ dhundanā payā. Kyo? Phool tujhe dhundan paya. Nagar, nagar, gagar, gagar, or dagar, dagar. So I want to give you one flower, oh Lord, but I couldn't find that flower which I want to give you. I was searching door to door, shore to shore, and beach to beach, and along the rivers and parks and forests and everywhere. But I didn't find that flower. I know that there must be that flower. But I felt I couldn't find. I came with empty hands. Oh Lord, what can I offer you? I do not dare to come close to you to offer that flower which I want to give you. I couldn't find it anywhere. Yes, look within thyself. Ask thyself. There is no shore, no door, and no beach. But within thy heart, surrender that. Sab kus diyā āpne, bhet karūn kyā nāth. Sab kus diyā āpne, bhet karūn kyā, joḍun dono hāth. What is? How do you say? "Mam hirde ko bhet karun, jodun dono haath." Sab kuch diyā āpne, bheṭ karūn kyā nāth. That flower outside, you will not find. Bhagavān, God is everywhere, in every religion, in every creature. Just look within. So, the preaching, lake, tree, saint, holy saint, and rain—these four are here for selfless service to all creatures. A lake is there. Anyone can come and drink water, take water, and bathe inside. The lake will not say, "Moment, moment, you are Slovakian. You can't get in our lake." The lake will not say. The tree will not say, "Wait a moment, don't eat my fruit. You are born from Bohemia. Don't sit on the Moravian tree." No, that's not true. And a saint, when preaching, is for all. And when it rains, it rains for all. So that love is that love we don't know, that love. And when we know that love is, that love is God. And that God is sitting within us. He is not one, he is immense, multiplied everywhere, and though he is in the whole universe, different, but still he is only one. Like one is grandfather, father, the same person is father, the same person is son, the same person is calling my grandchildren. The same person is a husband, the same person is an uncle; it is only one person, but the relations are different. So one God in different hearts. So if you understand that, then it's. So therefore, Dayā Rāmjī said, the satsaṅg with the sādhus and the reading of the holy books, these are too rare. Money, children, and partners, everyone has, but only these two things are rare in Kali Yuga, mostly. Therefore, Gurujī was very straightforward, very wise, great, holy, and divine. One day, Holy Gurujī said to me—I was sitting in a car called a Škoda and traveling from Ostrava to Bratislava. We were sitting behind me and Gurujī, and it was evening. So we left about sunset time, and we arrived around 11 in Bratislava. And then Gurujī told me how strict the training with Mahāprabhujī was. Holy Gurujī has tears, so he tried many times to go away. So his situation was, he wanted to go. Mahāprabhujī is here, he wanted to go there, and he's turning, and he's again back there. Because Mahāprabhujī loved Holy Gurujī very much, very much. That's why Holy Gurujī became Mahāprabhujī. Everything. So that's the glory of the Master. So Jesus, the Holy Father said, I know you will be. Many parts are broken, but you are unbreakable. Because I am inside, then is everything good. Therefore, never think that my Master doesn't love me. The Master cannot be against anyone. If they are against, they will get karmic punishment. Om Śrī Dīp Nārāyaṇ Bhagavān Kī, Deveśvar Mahādev Mādhava Kṛṣṇa Bhagavān Kī Jai, Sanātana Dharma Kī Jai.

This text is transcribed and grammar corrected by AI. If in doubt what was actually said in the recording, use the transcript to double click the desired cue. This will position the recording in most cases just before the sentence is uttered.

The text contains hyperlinks in bold to three authoritative books on yoga, written by humans, to clarify the context of the lecture:

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