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Devotion, Love and Marriage (part 1)

A spiritual discourse on independence, attachment, and the nature of true freedom, concluding with a historical parable.

"We should depend only on one thing, and that is our food—our sattvic, pure vegetarian food. Otherwise, we are not depending on anyone."

"The aim of our human life is to be free, to cut off all ties, but it does not mean that you cut off your love."

The speaker teaches that dependence on anything other than basic sustenance is a form of self-imprisonment, contrasting it with the freedom found in non-attachment and selfless love. He discusses overcoming fear and karmic bondage to achieve moksha. To illustrate the power of faithful partnership, he begins a story about a king named Mansingh, whose wife's devotion is tested by a Mughal ruler.

Recording location: Czech Republic, Strilky, Weekend seminar

In life, it is very important to lead an independent life. We should depend only on one thing, and that is our food—our sattvic, pure vegetarian food. Otherwise, we are not depending on anyone. When you feel dependent, it means you have imprisoned yourself. It is said that when you depend on someone, you are not happy even in your dreams. It is necessary not to be dependent on your feelings either; don't be the slave of your feelings. Also, don't depend on your emotional thoughts, and don't become blind with your dry, negative intellect. In this Chaurāsī Chakrā, in the cycle of rebirth and death of the 8.4 million creatures, we were caught by our karmas, we were caught by our habits and senses, and we went through immense pain, unhappiness, and troubles. It is not easy for the soul to leave this body so easily. Maybe we are not afraid to die, but we are afraid of how we will die. We are only afraid of the pain. And such pain, where does it come from? It means in the past you had this pain. It means you have already experienced such pain in the past, and you don't want to repeat it again. So finally, we came to human life, and the aim of our human life is to be free, to cut off all ties, but it does not mean that you cut off your love. Love towards your children, love towards your parents, love towards your partner, and love towards all your other best friends—that is not dependence; you are free. But if you depend physically, emotionally, mentally, financially, then you are imprisoned and you can't be happy. Then if you miss that, you will cry because you are missing it; you think you can't live anymore without that person or without those things. Either you give it up, or it will be taken away from you. If you give it up with free will, there is joy in it, happiness and freedom. But if it is taken away from you, then it will be more painful, more sad; it will create anxiety, it will create anger because it is taken away from you. But you know, you were not the owner of those things. This was given to you for a while; don't try to be the owner forever. Even this body will not be with you forever; all your feelings will not be with you forever. What you think is yours will not be yours, so we shall practice detachment to free ourselves. And when you look within yourself, what makes you unhappy? What troubles you? You will see it's only your attachment. Then you will never be happy, so the aim of human life is to get mokṣa. No more karmic bondage; you are free, and you can't imagine how happy you will be. Imagine there is one cage, and in this cage one bird is closed in. Now the nature of the bird is to fly limitless, high up, horizontal, vertical, tree to tree, fields to fields, village to village, but you have closed that bird in a small cage. Do you know what karma you will have to suffer? For this bird, it is a lifelong prison. And you go to the forest and you open the door of the cage, and the bird flies. Again, she is happy to stretch her wings and use her muscles and enjoy nature, her nature. So we have limited ourselves; we have imprisoned ourselves and we can't come out of it. If you think that you are imprisoned by your partner, then you will never be happy. The love will disappear, and you know, to be lifelong with a partner is the most beautiful thing. And it is said that spirituality grows together with husband and wife. These are the two wings for the bird to fly. The two bodies, physical bodies, these are the two wings of the bird, and the ātmā of both becomes one soul of that bird, and this cannot happen without love. That love you may call devotion, which I explained to you yesterday. The husband does have devotion towards his wife, a bhāva, and the wife also has devotion towards her husband. It is said that the wife will never eat until the husband comes home, and the husband also will not eat before he sees her face, if she's okay, if she's happy. All kings from India had to be under the Mughals. And they were serving them like slaves. So one Mughal was called Bahādshāh. And this Bhaṭa, he had his fort in New Delhi and had two or three hundred kings. One day, one Muslim saint came, called a fakīr. Fakīr does not mean one who is sitting on a needle bed. In Europe, you always take what is negative. Yoga means standing on the head and sitting with twisted legs. This is a picture; what do you think yoga is? Fakīr, sitting on needle beds, vegetarianism to become ill—I live in Europe, yes? I learn many, many good things; there are countless good things. But the European mentality is this: you always search first for the negative point. You don't see the rose; you see first the thorns. Anyhow, I will not tell more because I have to live in Europe. So fakīr does not mean one who is sitting on a needle bed. Fakīr means one who has no more worries; fakīr means above everything. Fakīr means free; fakīr means the divine, realized. But it has to be a fakīr, not like you. I can't call you a fakīr, you know. You are only a lakīr, not a fakīr. Lakīr means a line on a stone. A line on the stone, so you can only go on this line. If you come a little out, you are afraid. You didn't overcome your fear—neither social fear, cultural fear, religious fear, emotional fear, intellectual fear, nor existential fear; you are a sack of fear, that's why when I come near to you, I feel like this. I'm coming to fear; that's why you can't be a fakīr. A fakīr is also sitting here and hanging a knife with a very thin thread; any time that thread will break, and now the fakīr has to meditate there under the knife—and what will you do? Like this, that's it. So one fakīr came to the Bahādshāh, and he saw many kings sitting there—some five years, some one year, some three years; the fakīr was angry. And Bahādur, he said, "Bahādur, you imprison so many kings here; what about their queens? You didn't think of them? If one of the queens only will give you what they call a curse, your old bad side will be finished; that is the power of the woman. Power of the partner. Because that's called satī, pativratā, the true partner, the faithful partner." Bhaṭa said, "Lord, I will consider this." So when the fakīr went away, Bahādshāh called all the kings and said, "Is there anyone of you here who can tell me, while putting a hand on the heart, that my queen, my wife, is my faithful one? Then I will send you home, but before that, I will make a test. If the test will be positive, then lifelong you have to stay here. Be sure; you know the female theater, the female history, so before you say it, it is a question of your life: be here forever, or go home and enjoy your freedom and your kingdom." So there was one king from this state called Bundi. He stood up and said, "I can tell you my wife is one of the greatest divine, faithful ones." Bhaṭa said, "Very good; you have to wait for one year. I have to make a test." So Bhaṭa had one brother-in-law. It's called Fajula Khān. Fajula Khān said to Bhaṭa, "Your Highness, this chance should be given to me as a great privilege; within no time, I will prove that his wife is not a faithful one." He said, "Okay, you go." So he went to Bundi, but of course, the palace was closed. No one could enter; they had their soldiers also. So he lived six months there as a beggar. But he had no chance to see the queen. Then he asked the secret police about the family history—this is a true story—and they said, "Yes, King Man Singh has one aunt, the sister of his father, and since married, maybe she came once or twice back; no transportation, long distance, married, and there was always fear that another king would kidnap the queens, so the women were always kept in the treasure. Are you proud of yourself? Yes. You wish your husband will keep you also nicely in the treasure. I wish you that in the treasure of your heart." Well, then he met one woman and asked her to do a favor for him. At that time, mostly women were active in getting secret messages. Anything you want to know, tell your wife; she will find out quicker than you. They are best in psychology; they know how to go into the heart. So she dressed as the aunt of the king, and had a few ladies around her, that's called the slaves, and some men as protectors, and with one very nice horse coach, she was coming like Her Majesty. And sent a message to the palace. The aunt has come. The wife of Mansingh was very happy and she received her. And she did not know that this was the aunt really, because at that time there were no pictures, no cameras. And that lady, when she walked through the palace, "Oh, this was my grandfather's portrait. Oh, this is the chair my father loved so much." And she lived with her. Then they became such good friends. So one day they were having a bath together. It was a king's bath, like half of this room. And one day they had a bath together, and at that time the baths were such that it was half of this room. The fountains and like a big bathtub and the swimming pools and like this. And there were fountains and pools of water and the like. So both ladies, the queen of Mansingh, and the aunt, the wrong aunt, were enjoying the bath, with a bath dress, of course. So the aunt saw that on Mansingh's wife's thigh there was a brown spot like a scar, and she said, "Thanks to God, I have the evidence. Now I can tell the king that she is not faithful. I know that she has some scar on the thigh." Then she asked Mansingh's wife, "My nephew is not here for three years. Did he give you something when he went? So that every day you see this? Do you remember him?" She said, "Yes." There was a small knife. She said, "This is what he gave me." She took it, that lady, and said, "This was from my father. My dear one, I don't ask you for anything, please give me this as a present; it's my father's heritage." Mansingh's wife said, "Please, you can't do this to me; this means a lot for me. It's only this knife which keeps me alive. When I see it, I see my husband himself." You see? The dedication of a wife and the dedication of the husband. Three years. Nowadays, three hours and you are thinking of divorce. Rām, Rām, Rām, Rām, Rām. What a God, what a God. Jesus Maria. She said, "You are coming from a poor family. You have no education. You don't know how to behave. It's my father's property. It's my heritage. I will keep this and I will tell my nephew how you behaved to me." Oh God. She said, "Dear aunt, don't be angry. Take it. Though it's very hard for me, I'm giving you my heart, and please keep it safely." She said, "Yes, this I like." She put it in. "You know, tomorrow I'm going. So I will arrange everything for my departure." She said, "Stay a few days more." "No, I have no time." Now she got what she wanted. She already got what she wanted and left, departed, and after a few kilometers she changed clothes and went meanwhile to Fajula Khan. She says, "So, dear Fajula Khan, solid proof. This is the knife which she always had with her, given by Mansingh; she will not eat without looking at this knife, and she will not sleep without holding it in her hand." He said, "Thank you. Second, any more evidence?" "Yes, on the right thigh high up, two to three centimeters, this scar." "Thank you, enough." And he hurried up and went to Delhi. And Bahādur Shāh came, "Oh, Fajula Khan, you are here. It took a long time." He said, "Your Highness, it was so joyful; she didn't let me go away. Every day she said, 'Please stay one day more, please stay one day more.' Oh, she was in love with me, and we had many beautiful days and hours. As proof, she has here a sign, a dark sign on the thigh, and as a memory, as a souvenir on my departure, she gave me this knife, told me, 'Please keep it here.'" "Call your Mansingh." Bahādur Shāh called Mansingh. "Mansingh, I told you the trick and character of the woman; you can't trust her." He said, "Why?" "Do you know this knife?" He said, "Yes, sir." "Do you know that she has a black spot on her thigh?" He was sweating. "Yes, sir." "I told you. She is not a faithful one. Now lifelong you have to stay here." Mansingh said, "Your Highness, I beg you, just for one day let me go home. I promise you I will come straight back." The king said, "You are not going to kill her?" "No, no, no, sir, I will not do this." And he took that knife and went home. The rest of the story will be next time. The rest of the story will be next time. --- Recording location: Czech Republic, Strilky, Weekend seminar

This text is transcribed and grammar corrected by AI. If in doubt, what was actually said in the recording, use the transcript to double click the desired cue. This will position the recording in most cases just before the sentence is uttered.

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