TV Channel

The day after tomorrow is Pūrṇimā, so the real Rakṣā Bandhan day is the day after tomorrow. However, because of our program, as we are all leaving tomorrow, we thought we would have the program together today. We wanted to make it a little more on a large scale, but according to Indian tradition and culture, we do not celebrate any festival for two years if some family member has left this world. For us, he is Holy Gurujī; he is our family member. Therefore, Holī, Dīvālī, and Rakṣā Bandhan are the festivals which we do not celebrate with that kind of feeling for two years. But Guru Pūrṇimā, their anniversary, birthday, and Śivarātri are another kind of festival; that is not a festival of enjoyment but more for spiritual thinking, spiritual development, and prayers. Otherwise, other festivals are more or less for the folks—a matter of happiness, forgiveness, giving presents, and making friends like this. So if one is not able to forgive someone on these days, then one will never be able to forgive anyone, even oneself. Our ancestors, or wise persons, the saints, were thinking very much about how to maintain this human society so that it remains together with harmony and understanding. We say, when in the kitchen you have many pots, it is natural that no matter how careful you are, still some pot will make noise. Because the many pots are together. Or we say when the ladies, who have the first legs here, when they are many, it doesn't matter how careful they are, but when they move a little bit, their hand makes noise. There was a great incarnation, Lord Brahmā, Viṣṇu, and Śiva in one; his name was Dattātreya. Dattātreya lived at Mount Abu in Rajasthan; there is his āshram on the peak of Mount Abu and the cave, a very beautiful cave, and that āshram is called Guru Śikhar. He is a very great saint or holy incarnation respected throughout the world. There is also a story of Anasūyā, so there are many great saints and beautiful stories; there have been in his stories women, the female great holy persons, great. So Dattātreya said he has many gurus. One day he went for Bhikṣā, for alms. And there was a young girl, a young lady, 17 or 18 years old. Her father-in-law and mother-in-law came to visit our family for an engagement. They came to ask if they would unite their daughter with their son. Of course, they will say yes, but we have to consult with the astrologer—if our children will be happy together or not. And there's a lot of things to think over. Not that your son is beautiful or my daughter is beautiful, or you are rich, so okay, I can give my daughter there, or I will marry a rich man. You see, money is not everything in life, and this physical beauty is also not everything in life. But what is important in your life is inner understanding and harmony. So there is a partner for you, but you have no time to wait for this partner. Already at 11 or 12 years, boys and girls in Europe go with friends and stay in their friend's house. What do you expect now? And then you are talking that in India the children are married; children are not married. They have a kind of some first ceremony, but still they have a decision when they are grown. Anyhow, you have to wait. If you fell in love from looking emotionally, your marriage will not be a happy marriage. But something should move you inside. And one should begin to think on this subject after finishing complete study. But here, before you finish study, already you are a grandmother. Kali Yuga, what to say? No wonder that you are unhappy. No wonder that you are disappointed. No wonder that you are abused. How you are dressing, you are giving an invitation. Thanks to the men that they are very strong, that they don't become really crazy. Some are crazy, really, but sometimes they are mistaken. But in the way which you are dressing your daughters, you are offering your daughters to everybody; think over this, it will destroy humanity and has destroyed already. There are many things, so we have to begin again from the beginning. You know, when you are counting something in mathematics and if you made a mistake, then we have to begin again from the beginning. So we have to begin again from those times where the humans at least were happily married. And this was the title given by children yesterday: we children wish for a happy family, a happy father and mother. Of course, you don't like your husband anymore now. One day he was a god for you; everything, "Oh my God," but in the world, this is something for you, and today he is the devil; you don't know how to get out of it. Then there will be separation with bitterness. Why? Because we do not follow those ancient principles. So if you want to protect your daughters, then dress them properly and don't be crazy after this, what they call fashion. So this is a big problem. What I'm telling you is, if you want to protect your child from bad society and drugs, then it's now the right time to educate them, not with force but with love. And of course, too much love spoils them. Holy Gurujī told me that in one hand he has lāḍū, you know, sweet like a cake, and in one hand he has a stick. And he asked me clearly, "What do you want?" I said, "Lāḍū, okay." But he said, "Then you see, still the other hand, he has a stick in his hand. So the lāḍū is gone out of my hands, but the stick is still in my hand. If he would have chosen the stick, then the stick is gone, but still I have, as a love, lāḍū in my hands." So parents must have both things in hand; otherwise, the child will be lifelong suffering because of your blind love. So children don't need your toys; children need your love. And children don't need your money; children need your wisdom. So what I'm telling you is really a serious point. Some of you who are sitting here told me, not only one but three, four people, when you go to the underground train or bus in the morning before school time and college time, children, girls who are 10, 11, 12 years old, 13 years old, how they are dressed. It's not proper. It's an invitation. Therefore, also you have to teach the children to protect themselves. Don't say, "Now it's our society and we must do like this, and one is dancing like that, we must dance like that." You will find your husband is waiting for you. Or your wife is waiting for you. It doesn't matter even if you are 50 years old. After 50 years you will find that. But you should have the nerves to wait till 50 years. Though even at 25 years, the midlife crisis begins already nowadays. Before 25 years, or it was a 40-year midlife crisis, but now it's only 25 years. And I tell you, after two decades or three decades, the midlife crisis will be already 15 years. And which is already happening. Already children have depression, don't want to study, cry, blame the parents, and so on. Why? Because of this wrong understanding, wrong education, and wrong freedom. So no force, not at all force, but explanation. Like you explain to the child, "Don't put your hand in the fire; you will burn." So, it always had been like this. So the Dattātreya went to one house where someone was standing there, and there was this young girl about 17, 18 years, and she had these beautiful rings on her arms, 5, 6, 7, and she was working something with the grains. And every time when she was hitting the grain, these rings were making noise. So she took one ring out, and then she was working. Still it was nice. She took the second ring out, and still it was nice. The third she took out, fourth, fifth, sixth, and he was all looking what she is doing. Then remained only one; then there was no noise because she didn't want to make noise. Otherwise, her future father-in-law, they will say, "What a girl, uneducated and noisy," because she wanted to be very silent and very quiet. And girls need the mother's education before they go to the husband's house. Dattātreya said, "She is my guru." She taught me: where there is two, there is quarreling. Where there is more, there is quarreling. But where there is only one, no quarreling. So therefore, he said, that time already, only one is the Brahman. And where there is two, there is the unreality. And where there is duality, there is always mixed quality and quarreling, fighting.